✵ [Jan Catchall] Hope is not pretending that troubles don't exist.

[phoenixblessed]

⌛ Who: Diluc Ragnvindr (phoenixblessed), Red Wine, (judgementor), Vennessa (vennessa), Thanatos (inevitablerest) & Raphael (cupiditasmedendi) & you perhaps.
⌛ What: General prompts, TDM stuff, & closed prompts for January. Drop me a prompt to answer if you like!
⌛ When: Through January
⌛ Where: Noted in threads
⌛ Warnings: Will be marked when they are needed

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✵ Diluc Ragnvindr
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✵ Red Wine
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✵ Thanatos
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✵ Vennessa
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✵ Raphael
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Comments

[phoenixblessed]

[Diluc is... definitely confused. The puzzled twist of his expression draws out the youthfulness that is so often hidden by stony maturity and as Childe stands up he sets his cup down. This feels different to the times he has tried to leave before. Before, it had always felt like he was trying to goad, somehow, or like the farewell was some kind of flippant dismissal.

This time it feels like he's trying to run... but from what?]

Something I said?

[Fairly confident he had said nothing that would actually bother the man, he doesn't think too hard about it. Instead, when Childe tries to pass him to leave, he catches hold of his wrist with warm fingers and stands up. The combination of actions puts him very close, but with the chair behind him he hardly has the space to move back without scraping the thing across the floor.

The hair on the back of his neck prickles, but he doesn't give ground. His gaze fixes intently on the other man's, the grip on his wrist solid and yet gentle enough to be easily escaped.]

Childe. For reasons I cannot understand, I am trying with you. But you're not making it easy.

[acutabove]

[ Diluc is suddenly too close, too quickly, his fingers a hot brand around his wrist and searing into his skin. It's not anywhere near as intense as his mind makes it out to be, probably doesn't even hurt, really, but that in conjunction with everything that's happened between them thus far is enough to make his body throb in anticipation, a blunt ache that practically begs to be sated.

At first he thinks it's just an aftereffect of the kizuna. That maybe this shop, or the weather, even, is having some kind of adverse effect on him. It makes it hard to take in Diluc's words at first, and by the time he realizes that the other might be frustrated with what's happening, he's not really sure how to react.

Because Diluc is trying, for whatever reason. There hasn't been any kind of dismissal, nothing to suggest the redhead wouldn't want his company for longer. ]

Diluc... [ He begins, feeling the stares of people on them. But he doesn't pull his hand away, doesn't move, continues giving him this helpless, wary look - and if it happens to drop down to his lips, gauging the distance between him, maybe Diluc won't quite notice. ]

[phoenixblessed]

[He's surprised at himself. Both that he tried to stop Childe from leaving, that he grabbed his arm to do so, and that he is tolerating being this close to him with nothing more than a prickle across the back of his neck. He hears his name spoken, though it sounds oddly distant as he meets that expression on the Harbinger's face with his own eyes slightly widened.

His heart is racing. He realises it all at once when it occurs to him that the thudding pulse in his ears is far too regular a sound to be coming from outside. Childe's eyes dip down - he notices, close as they are - and his bright red ones shift in mimic of the gesture. The other man's skin feels cool under his fingers, a tingling spreading out over his hand and up his arm.

People are watching. He can feel people looking at him - a few openly so, but most attempting to be covert about it. It hardly matters to him. Having eyes on him is not a new experience.

It feels like a minute has passed though it could have only been seconds. Everything pulls together into a split-second, impulsive decision and the thought only briefly flashes across his mind that he's going to regret this before his grip tightens on Childe's wrist and he gives his arm a tug, pulling him in and pressing a warm kiss to his mouth.]

[acutabove]

[ Whatever was going to come next, Childe had resolved himself that he would accept it. It's enough, he thinks, that they're civil, that they hadn't come to blows yet - even if a part of him really wanted to - and that, uneventful though it had been, he was enjoying himself. It's enough, he doesn't need anything more than that.

Time seems to stretch on between them. It's likely they'd caught the attention of staff and guest alike, but their refugee status ends up being enough of a boon that no one calls out to them straight away, content on letting them do whatever it is that refugees do.

This close he finds himself taken with how vibrantly red Diluc's eyes are, his hair, and he's reminded of one of their first encounters when he'd compared it to blood over the snow. His opinion hasn't changed in the slightest and he thinks, dimly, if it's Diluc then he doesn't mind.

Too soon there's a tug on his arm, he's shifting forward and then a warm mouth against his. Diluc tastes of the tea that he's been drinking and something else, something so distinctly him it would be hard to mistake it for anyone else. The bucket of shells clatters to the floor, drawing more attention to them and his hand goes to curl against the back of Diluc's neck to drag him in and deepen the kiss. ]

[phoenixblessed]

[His mind must have shut off. That's the only way to explain this - why he did this, and why his instincts aren't screaming at him to stop. Even when the bucket clatters to the floor, narrowly missing his foot, he doesn't so much as flinch.

Childe leans in and that should startle him, too. The hand against the back of his neck should startle him, as vulnerable a position as it is. It doesn't. None of it does.

One of Diluc's hands clenches into the fabric at Childe's hip and the other fists into the back of his hair. It's as soft as it's always looked, he realises dimly, and it's that thought rather than anything else that kicks him back into his own head and has him pulling back. He stares with an expression of bewildered confusion settled across his face and his grip on the Harbinger's clothes and hair loosens slightly.]

That-- [His voice cracks. He clears his throat, letting his fingers slip out of Childe's hair and to his shoulder.] We should leave. Now.

[acutabove]

[ The noise he makes against Diluc's mouth when he feels the hand fisting against the hair at the nape of his neck, tugging roughly on the strands, is hard to match with the Harbinger himself. It feels like everything is being swallowed up by the other man, like he's stealing the breath from his lungs and replacing it with an oppressive, smothering heat, like he's dragging out all of his honed discipline, his control and replacing it with something wanton and feverish and desirous. His other hand moves to curl into Diluc's shirt in turn, and even he's not sure if he wants to rip it off of him or drag him closer with the hold; either way he imagines it'll get him the same result.

When Diluc pulls away it's instinct to chase after his mouth, gaze opened only halfway and the raw desire in his eyes framed by the dip of his lashes. He's left hungry for more, wanting and needy and --

Fuck. He remembers where he is, remembers where they are, and he has to fight a losing battle with himself not to just shove Diluc on the table and have him until they end up being strong-armed out of the cafe. The redhead's voice cracks and he feels a part of him crack with it, but he's able to pull himself together enough to collect his dropped things and turn on his heel to make for the door.

If his steps happen to be a little quicker than before, that's no one's business but his own. ]

[phoenixblessed]

[Diluc's knees feel like they might buckle under him as he steps quickly after the other man, barely remembering to grab his scarf before he does. He ignores the curious stares that follow them, gives a distracted wave to the staff as they watch him leave, and the cool air that hits him when he walks out of the door does absolutely nothing to help the warmth suffusing his entire body.

Shaken out of whatever impulse had brought that action on, the next natural progression of emotions begins to set in. The pit of his stomach clenches as panic knots with confusion and self-loathing and burns a tight sensation in the back of his throat.

Diluc does not kiss people for no reason. He isn't the kind of person to use his body in that way. He doesn't do it for no reason, so why would he--...

They make it a few metres from the door and he's reaching for Childe's arm again, still not understanding why (why, why, why--!) he would want to. There was nothing in the tea, he doesn't use the drugs on offer in Nippon, so this... it must just be him.

Them.

He holds on to Childe's arm so lightly. There's no need for him to be rough for the man to know how strong he is - he already knows.]

I don't-- [Diluc's words stumble over themselves.] You can ignore that-- that that ever happened. If... if--

[acutabove]

[ The air outside is blessedly breezy enough that it does wonders to cool the heat under his skin, injects some sense of normalcy back into his racing thoughts and quells the surging tide of desire and want that's making a mess of all his emotions. Even with the lingering presence of Diluc's mouth against his like an echo, Childe still takes a deep, steadying breath in once he's outside and exhales it, slowly, willing his body to calm down so as not to make walking an issue.

He's not entirely sure where they're going, or if they're going together at all. Diluc's presence is heralded by the sound of the door chiming open and closing, and once they make their way comfortably enough away from the shop that they can rule out that it's something in the air making them act this way towards one another, Childe feels the anticipation in his stomach and give way to something softer.

He had said he'd liked him. Apparently he hadn't realized how much.

The Harbinger means to say as much when he feels Diluc's hand on his arm, pulling on it, and he turns to regard the redhead beside him and the look on his face. His gaze wanders over Diluc's features, the expression he wears and he thinks, if the other man wanted to forget then he'd be fine with it. They might have to avoid each other for a long while after this, but that's okay.

It's probably the high of their kiss that has him laughing almost giddily, shaking his head and reaching out to gently press a hand over Diluc's chest. And then over to his shoulder, gripping at his arm in turn and kneading at it reassuringly. ]

I like you, Diluc. [ It's said so openly, honestly, there isn't room left for him to doubt. ] It's okay. It's okay. Whatever you want.

[phoenixblessed]

[As for Diluc, going from actively disliking the man to... whatever he feels about him now had apparently snuck up on him so thoroughly that he hadn't realised it fully until now. It had always made sense in his mind for him to hate Childe, to hate everything he represented (and he still hates that, honestly), but this is something that doesn't come to him easily. He had been willing to try, to be civil, maybe even something that could be interpreted as friendly...

He is going to have to have a long period of introspection after this.

His heart jumps against the touch to his chest, a glance going across to the hand placed on his shoulder and he looks up with a soft, uncertain frown.]

Whatever I want?

[What does he want when it comes to Childe? He thought he knew, but the last ten minutes have forced a dramatic reset of how he sees their entire relationship and he can still feel the tingle of the man's mouth on his. He had done that. That had been his decision. A choice.

Is it okay?]

I-I think I... [Maybe it wouldn't be too surprising if he bolted right now, but his feet feel rooted into place. He reaches up, clasping his hand over the one on his shoulder, holding it there.] I think... I would like... [He speaks carefully, as if to keep things he doesn't want to say from launching themselves out of the chaotic swirl of his thoughts.]

To spend some time with you.

[acutabove]

[ Now that he has some inkling as to what their relationship is, it's easier to fall back into old habits. The confidence comes readily to him, and while it wasn't hard to present himself with the self-assuredness he'd become known for, not knowing whatever was going on between him and Diluc had made him hesitate - understandably so. As much as he enjoyed doing as he pleased on any given day he had stakes in this, as well. Diluc had seen probably more of him than anyone else had, more of his past than he'd let anyone be privy to. It wasn't all of it, and there were parts of him that people that weren't Diluc knew about, but it was enough to gently nudge the redhead into his affections.

He can still feel the running undercurrent of heat beneath his skin, still feel the way his stomach tightens with desire, with feeling the other man's grip over him. There's a warmth emanating from the redhead that he can't quite escape, and he realizes after a moment or two that he doesn't really want to.

So he lets Diluc catch him, lets him hold his hand, for a moment. When the redhead speaks he listens, head inclined a bit, and then nods. The flicker of shyness in his own gaze is quick and fleeting for anyone not really looking for it, and after the silence lingers between them, broken up only by the waves crashing on a distant shore and the rolling peals of thunder, he speaks. ]

Do you want me to walk you home?

[phoenixblessed]

I...

[Oh, by the gods, he's going to have to explain this to Kaeya isn't he. If he's lucky the man will just find it funny. He'll probably just find it funny.

Diluc straightens his shoulders - a subtle motion - as he lifts his hand from the one clasped there and lets his arms drop to his sides. He feels... defeated, in a way, though that is probably a ridiculous way to feel or in the very least an entirely inappropriate one. Of all people, it had to be--

Ah, well... it could have been worse.

He closes his eyes for a moment and takes a breath. Tries to calm the buzzing under his skin and the way his heart is racing, how his stomach is still churning in a nauseating mix of excitement and disgust at the way his arousal had so immediately spiked from something so simple as a kiss.]

All right.

[It's easier to go by train - not far, but quicker - but on foot it isn't outside of a reasonable distance. Diluc tends to prefer to walk anyway, with the weird things that can happen on the trains sometimes.]

It's this way.

sticks a bow on this

[acutabove]

[ With Diluc's nod in acceptance, Childe feels a little more of the anxieties he hadn't known he had ease away. The smile he leverages in the other man's direction is his usual soft, warm ones, unmistakably affectionate and a little playful. He'll drop his arm before turning in the direction the man indicated and even goes so far as to give him a little bump with his shoulder before he sets off.

While Diluc may have hangups about having people walk behind him, it's apparent Childe doesn't have any such qualms. The pace he sets is quick, but not too brisk, his long legs taking him to their destination in ambling strides while he looks over his shoulder every so often to make sure Diluc is following behind. The conversation is light, hardly there but Childe doesn't leave them in silence the whole time; he fills it with chattering about the weather, the storm and pointing out the different shops and the wildlife they might spot along the way to offer his input.

And if he happens to bump shoulders with Diluc more than usual, if he happens to look at him, lingering, furtive glances that blossom into wide, beaming smiles - then that's fine, too. ]