inexplicably high, inexplicably low

[brightred]

⌛ Who: Grell and OPEN!
⌛ What: sometimes your fiancé shows up and doesn't recognize you because the crau hasn't kicked in so you decide it's time to just get over him
⌛ When: april 5th/6th, and a couple more nights
⌛ Where: Yoshiwara bars to start...
⌛ Warnings: alcohol+sexual content


[She didn't learn her lesson. She should have, should have learned it a long time ago, should have learned it with Ann, should have learned it with every single day of work she's put in. But she hadn't. She'd let herself care, a few weeks of close contact with strangers and life and death situations, and she'd let herself get attached.

Stupid of her, to care about a foolish, mortal man with sad eyes and an earnest heart, who took her by the hand and said things like I love you at all the wrong times.

It's the time loops, she knows that. It isn't his fault someone erased his Cinematic Record, or maybe that that part of it was never recorded in the first place. That doesn't mean she isn't going to blame him for it, because if he really loved her he wouldn't have forgotten her, would have moved heaven and earth and time itself to be here with her.

She finishes her drink, she's lost track of how many she's had but it doesn't matter, she doesn't want to think about counting drinks, or anything else right now. She's exactly where she wants to be.

At the start of the night it's fine, she's not in a good mood but she's an actress, she can smile and flirt and strike up conversations with pretty people at the various bars she's visiting. She's dressed up, a hint of makeup, loose pleated trousers and a ruffled shirt, a bright red haori. She's charming, attentive, flirtatious with a flutter of eyelashes and a flash of sharp teeth in a laugh.

Later, she can't be bothered. She'll watch, make a decision, gesture at a stranger to get them to come over. If they aren't expecting to be forcefully kissed by a slightly disheveled stranger with smudged lipstick, maybe they should learn to read the room better.

Later still, or early the next morning (it doesn't matter, those hours after midnight aren't important) she's slumped on the counter of a bar, toying with a cup of something-or-other. Her red hair is pulled loose from what must have been a careful updo at some point earlier, her blouse isn't quite buttoned correctly, and she's frowning at her drink.]

Comments

[holeful]

[It hits him square in the face, and he stumbles backwards. He sniffs, and a trickle of blood starts to leak out of his nose. Either he doesn't notice or doesn't care.

He opens his mouth to say something, then closes it? What more is he supposed to say? She didn't answer his question. He'll wait.]

[brightred]

What the hell do you want? [He's bleeding. She hates that. Why does he have to look so much like-- like himself.]

[holeful]

I was just wondering if you're alright?

[HE JUST SAID? He sniffs again, as if he has a runny nose and not a fucking... injury.]

[brightred]

Of course I'm not alright! [She stands, wobbly on her feet (those stiletto heels are not helping anything right now) and goes to walk away. She'll just... leave.]

[holeful]

[Oh... Those wobbles. He's going to hurry after her, hesitant to actually grab her but he is hovering anxiously, ready to try and grab her if she does fall.]

Is... it because you're drunk or because of me?

[brightred]

... I'm drunk because of you! [so, both?

Also don't touch her?? She jerks away from him, even if he doesn't try to touch her right now, stumbles against a chair and nearly goes down.

A bartender glances over, then dismisses this as a lover's quarrel and ignores them both.]

[holeful]

[OH NO.... He is Fretting.]

Well then if it's my fault, shouldn't it be my responsibility to get you home safely?

[brightred]

... it's your responsibility to remember me! [He's too familiar. She's tired.

She'd been willing to throw everything aside for him, defect, lose any chance at redemption her soul could ever find.

And he doesn't remember her. He stands there, talking about responsibility and getting her home safely when home is with a person that he won't ever be.]

Hydok these tags are destroying me

[holeful]

[He frowns, really so passive, more passive than he was, passive like he'd been when they first met. Unsure of himself.]

I want to. I don't know how. I've never forgotten this much before.

SAME

[brightred]

[... He doesn't know how. He looks...

She hates this. She can't be angry at him.]

I know. But...

Can't I be angry with you? I've lost someone precious.

[holeful]

[He sniffs again. The blood's dripping down onto his shirt. he reaches up to wipe at his face and gets distracted for a moment at the sight of his own blood when he pulls his hand away.]

I mean... I can't really tell you not to be angry? But no one's ever...
[He doesn't even have friends??? So a girlfriend is??? A lot???]

I can't help but be curious about you, I suppose.

[brightred]

[He's bleeding, still. She wants to kiss the blood away. She wants to make him bleed more. She wants to walk away and never have to look at his too-familiar face again.]

Don't be. Don't be curious about me! I don't want anything to do with you! You're not--- [She's too drunk for this, her eyes are stinging with a sudden hot rush of tears that she refuses to shed.]

[holeful]

[He wilts but... without his memories of Grell, of being on the ship, he's just not very assertive.]

I see... Well... Could you at least let me get you home safely?

[brightred]

No. [She says.

But...

One last time. She's weak, she's foolish, she wants to walk beside him one last time.]

... just once. Just tonight. But no, nothing after that.

[holeful]

[Even this small allowance makes him perk up. He wipes at his nose again, and tentatively offers his other arm for her to hold onto.]

If you're sure.
[He sighs in that sad dog way of his.]

You could yell at me more if you want.

[brightred]

... I don't want to yell at you. [She takes his arm, keeping him at a distance.]

I want you to remember me.

[holeful]

[Thinking..... Wiping his nose again. It does at least seem like it’s starting to bleed less, but it is still going.]

Well... in movies and tv, a lot of the time the person who has amnesia just needs to be reminded of something in particular and then their memories all come flooding back? So maybe if you told me some things?

[brightred]

[...

She turns, maybe surprisingly quickly with how inebriated she is, and kisses him. It's not gentle. She doesn't care about the blood on his face, the sharpness of her teeth, the fact that he isn't expecting it. She just wants to kiss Tamotsu, so she does.]

[holeful]

[He’s startled, of course? But he doesn’t back away. A pretty lady is kissing him why would he????

But then, at the same time... his shoulders slump a little because IF THIS WERE A MOVIE, THIS WOULD TOTALLY WORK? He would pause before seizing her in his arms and kissing back. And it would be very cool. Could he do that anyway? Could he just lie? No, no that wouldn’t work, because what if she asks for proof?

He really does want to kiss her back. It feels something like instinct to want to.]



... Sorry.

[brightred]

[She wants it to work, expects it to work, like the world is a paperback book or a cheap melodrama and he should be remembering, grabbing her and kissing her back, shocked by the contact into being who she wants him to be.

It isn't. He doesn't. She looks up at him, her vision blurred even with her glasses, and shakes her head.

She doesn't cry, blinks hard and rubs at her eyes with a gloved hand, knocking her glasses slightly askew.]

Why can't you remember?

[holeful]

[Fukuda and Grell both: IT WORKED IN MY STORIES IT SHOULD WORK IN REAL LIFE, THIS SUCKS!!!!

He politely looks away from her definitely not crying. Frowns a little. Sniffs.]

... Maybe I don't deserve to?

[brightred]

[REAL LIFE SUCKS]

Don't I? [Of course she doesn't. Of course she doesn't deserve him remembering, of course she deserved to remember it all herself just so it leaves her desperate and angry and missing him.]

[holeful]

... I don't know anything about you, miss Grell.

[DON'T REMIND HER YOU STUPID MAN?]

[brightred]

That wasn't a real question, Tamotsu. [She's slipping up, being too familiar even for how much she's already said she knows him. She doesn't care.]

[holeful]

[Yeah, he startles a bit at being addressed so informally? Then again, if she was his girlfriend, that's normal, isn't it? To have been that close to another person and then having forgotten it...]

... I'd like to though, I think.