" I'm not hungry anyway." he said softly against Will's chest. His free hand reaching behind him for that bottle of booze he had.

" Did you know.. Porsche has a younger brother?" he began, not waiting for an answer he went on after popping the lid off the bottle. " I absolutely shattered his heart. Pew into a million pieces." he lifted the bottle to his lips. " Why? Because I am a fucking monster." he said " He was so innocent, and I..I'm covered in blood."

The tears were rimming his eyes as he fixed himself so he could look to Will better. " I'll never be clean, I'll never be pure, not that I ever was. I was trained to kill from the time I could walk. We all were." he held up a finger, slowly he pointed to himself. " I am the worst of all of us. So now, I find myself very much in love with you and Riley, and I.. I don't deserve to feel that. I don't deserve anyone to love me like that either." it was then the tears rolled down his face. " And I don't know what to do, because I want you so much, even if I should tell you both to run." his voice broke there and he was trying to lift that bottle up again.