jikan_rpg | September catch-all

Wei Wuxian looked up with wide eyes from his noodles, which, until Sizhui sat across from him were his sole focus. He loved the dan dan noodles this restaurant served and it happened to be close to his job, so it was a win-win situation. The noodles even smalled spicy. Wuxian was on the verge of offering to share, when he remembered Sizhui really didn't have the palate for spicy food.

Then he blinked.

"You have rabbit ears!" Just like his Uncle! Well, Xingchen's aren't always floppy, but... "So cute!"

His cheeks colored a little and then he nodded. Yes. He truly had rabbit ears. "I have a tail too but I haven't had the chance to tailor my clothes for it yet."

It did make him happy that his father liked his ears though. He smiled at him as he relaxed a little. "I think that... I think that I know how I got them as well, Wei-qianbei."

Time to play dumb. "Have you grown close to someone, Sizhui?"

Cue those cheeks getting redder. To his credit, he didn't squirm in his chair even if he did lower his gaze. "Yes. To Lan Jingyi specifically..."

He tries to act shocked and, honestly, probably over-sells it with the gasp and his hands flying to cover his mouth.

"Lan Jingyi?"

Well that gasp certainly made his cheeks go redder! But he nodded quickly to confirm.

"Actually, and I greatly apologize for this, we sneaked out early from your wedding to, um, go drink alcohol..."

Wei Wuxian just stared a moment, then burst into laughter!

"Sizhui, the first time I met Lan Zhan, I was sneaking alcohol into the Cloud Recesses!"

Sizhui's cheeks colored more. They were so red at this point. He swallowed, completely unable to look up.

"...you likely did not become drunk and sit on his lap to kiss him though. Or need to have him carry you back only to end up sleeping with him in his bed."

Aw, how adorable! Wuxian's expression went completely soft and he peered happily at Sizhui.

"No, that didn't happen to us," he intoned with a wistful smile. "Don't be embarrassed. If you like Jingyi in that way, there's nothing wrong with any of that."

"I like him very much, Wei-qianbei."

No. No it was more than that. Shooting his head up, he looked right at his father so he could properly confess this to him. "I love him. I love him very much."

"Ah~ You Lans are so passionate in your declarations!" So calm and cool on the outside, but still waters run very deep, he's learned.

"You should tell him that. So there's no misunderstanding about your feelings." He paused, then looked down, thoughtful.

"Apparently everyone else knew Lan Zhan was in love with me for a very long time. And I thought he hated me because I just made assumptions and didn't ask."

"We already did. Express our feelings to each other. It's how I got my ears."

The tail from being drunk and their first kiss. The ears from confessing their feelings to each other. It was all quite a lot really.

"I was very worried he would have thought I was being inappropriate while I was drunk. That perhaps he would be upset or think I took advantage of him. I slept with him and..." Oh dear he was so red now. "...and I... I flashed my leg at him."

That first bit had Wei Wuxian gasping in genuine shock. But the follow-up left him snickering at himself.

"Sizhui, if you love him, he's going to see a lot more than just your leg, I promise."

Apparently Sizhui could actually get redder based on his reaction to that single sentence.

"That...that would be indecent though. We are not married and not yet adults, Wei-qianbei..."

"Do you think Lan Zhan is an indecent person?" Wei Wuxian leaned over and dropped his voice to a quiet whisper. "We had sex before we were married."

Cue a young Lan looking up with his mouth dropped open to hear this very intimate detail about his two fathers. And in public! He had absolutely no idea what to say to this. But it was also very clear he'd never considered this a possibility.

Let alone the fact that his fathers had... Before marriage!

"Sizhui," Wei Wuxian continued in a more conversational tone. "I think -- and this is just my personal thought on the matter -- I think that the prohibition against sex before marriage is to protect women. Imagine how terrible it would be for a woman to lay with a man who claims to love her and then she ends up with child and no one to look out for them? That's, uh, not a possibility with men."

While he'd known that he couldn't get pregnant, suddenly this was a very different conversation. And the Lan were not very good about, um, explaining how all of this worked. The question as right there on the tip of his tongue but it felt like a terrible idea. One he would live to regret.

"...What do...men...do?"

Too late. He'd asked.

"Lots of things!" Since they're in public, he does lower his voice a bit so the conversation can be as private as possible. "Men can be penetrated. You can use your hands to play with each other. You can use your mouths. You can rub up against each other."

They could...do all of that? But how? What did any of that actually mean? Sizhui stared at the man in utter confusion as he tried to process literally anything that he had just said to him. Literally anything.

Nope. Nothing was getting through. He was a virgin with no sex education. And now suddenly trying to understand how any of this applied to Jingyi.

And failing.

Ah, right... Gusu Lan was a bit of a prudish clan. Wei Wuxian sighed softly and wracked his brain for a way to explain.

"You learned anatomy right? So, um, you can do all that with... um... your thing."

That was so very vague. Sizhui tried to understand what part of his body was his...thing. The thing he could supposedly do all of this stuff with. He swallowed and looked down at the table.

"...what is the...thing?"

"Your penis." He sighed. "When you're attracted to someone, when you want to do sexually intimate things with them, your penis will get hard."

It would do what? Sizhui looked up in shock at the explanation. Swallowing, he tried to process this and somehow remain calm. "I am not sure how it...hardening...would apply to the rest. Of what you said."

Wei Wuxian isn't actually surprised by that. "Well, when you're with someone you care about and are attracted to, those are the various things you can do when it gets hard. So, you can just goof around and touch each other or you can actually have one partner penetrate the other... But there's some work that goes into that."

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